Introverts and Happiness free essay sample

Over the years psychologists have tried to group individuals into different personality groups and today everyone have been grouped into the so called big 5 personality traits. The most conspicuous of these groups are however the extreme personality traits of introversion on the one hand and extroversion on the other hand. Nonetheless it is common knowledge that no one can be an absolute introvert or an absolute extrovert. Even introverts do have some elements of extroversion and so do extrovert posses some elements of introversion. More often than not extrovert have been viewed as the ones who ideally have the most normal lifestyles while the introverts have been considered by many as having some abnormality. Needless to say, extroverts form the majority. Nevertheless, current examination of the introverts lives have started to reveal contrary opinions as the stereotypes that were initially leveled against the introverts begin to be laced out one by. We will write a custom essay sample on Introverts and Happiness or any similar topic specifically for you Do Not WasteYour Time HIRE WRITER Only 13.90 / page One such stereotype has been the debate about whether or not introverts are equally happy. This paper undertakes to look into the issue of the plight of the introverts with a view to proving that, contrary to the popular beliefs, introverts are actually leading a normal lifestyle and are truly happy. The difference in personality traits is usually observable in individuals from a very tender age. In the book, The Development of Shyness and Social Withdrawal, the author points out that, â€Å"a casual observer of preschoolers free play in the company of peers is likely to witness many distinct patterns of interrelations among the children. For example, some children would be interacting in small groups, perhaps engaged in dramatic play or taking turns playing a rule-governed game. Other children would be playing next to each other, drawing pictures or building with blocks, periodically monitoring what others are doing†¦.. still other children would be playing quietly alone or just watching their peers play, without trying to join in† (Rubin Coplan, ed. 3). This kind of differences in behaviors normally persists up to old age and is always reflected even in the kind of careers that these categories of people would prefer and indeed excel in. Buettner (1), for instance, writes that whereas extroverts would excel in â€Å"active, fast-paced jobs, such as politics, teaching and sales where quick decisions are common place†, introverts are more suited for careers like being â€Å"scientists, writers and artists† where they do not have to encounter many people more often. Most personality theories identify introversion as one of the major personality traits. According to a psychology dictionary, an introvert is â€Å"one who is inward looking, one who tends to focus on his own thoughts and feelings†. As such one can say that introversion implies focusing on the internal emotions without looking out for external motivations. The question therefore arises as to whether the so called introverts are able to derive self fulfillments and consequently happiness from within or are they just a bunch of dejected and sad people who prefer to keep to themselves? In an online article appearing on the ‘Psychology Today’ blog, Susan Cain poses the question, â€Å"are extroverts happier than introverts? (1). This is a question that has lingered in the minds of many for a very long time. She, Cain, goes ahead to share her concerns about how the world define happiness to which she wonders, â€Å"Is it joy, exultation, and a wide smile, or does it have many different expressions? † According to Susan there are several other ways/forms of being happy and as such it would be foolhardy to claim that introverts are not happy simply because they do not like keeping large companies. She offers five alternative ways of being happy, some of which include: ‘the happiness of short social outbursts’ according to which everyone, including introverts, becomes happier after a successful socialization session; the second is ‘the happiness of melancholy’ according to which everyone would derive pleasure from having someone sensitively articulate the fragile beauty of mankind; and yet another is the ‘happiness of gratitude’ according to which even introverts are grateful and happy for what they have. In an article dubbed, ‘Why I remain an introvert, though the science suggest extroverts are happier’ appearing in her own blog, Glori Surban, a self confessed introvert, though appearing to be concurring with the scientific findings that extroverts are happier than introverts, asserts that she wishes not to transform herself into an extrovert but instead endeavors to find out methods of being happy that best suits her biological programming. According to her, the fact that choosing to convert into an extrovert as opposed to looking for the most suitable ways of remaining happy as an introvert might seem to be the obvious answer does not actually make it the best answer. She concludes by saying that â€Å"there is more than one path to maximum happiness† (Surban 1). Even though research consistently points out to the fact that introverts keep fewer friends as compared to the extroverts, they have friends nevertheless only that they are normally keen on whom to allow to enter their inner circle. The difference might as well be only that they prefer to interact with friends on a face-to-face basis as opposed to in a group level. According to Rubin and Coplan (25), â€Å"introverts tend to be reticent with strangers and casual acquaintances, probably for two reasons: they prefer their own company to that of others (low sociability), and at least some of them are tense and inhibited when with others (shyness)† Even though shyness is always associated with introverts, it is not synonymous to introversion. Both introverts and extroverts alike can get shy depending on the circumstances in which they subjected. According to Buttner, â€Å"shyness is a feeling of uneasiness or anxiety experienced in social situations. Unlike introverts, who prefer less social stimulation, shy people often crave social interaction, but avoid it for fear of criticism or rejection† (1). Researchers have maintained that extroverts are happier than introverts partly because they often maintain a company of many friends; they are able to strike rapport with strangers easily and therefore socialize more. And the ability to socialize more freely and often has been used to determine ones level of happiness. Whether or not this is true is yet to be conclusively proven. Nonetheless, introverts on the other hand have been described as being less happy since they prefer keeping to themselves and socialize less. Most of these studies about happiness are always centered on socialization for determining the degree of happiness. This can prove to be biased to the disadvantage of the introverts since whereas they also derive happiness from being around people they are happier â€Å"when participating in lower-key activities† (Buttner 1). Introverts socialize as well only that they prefer to do it in smaller doses and with fewer people as compared to extroverts. There are several people who are working in active careers like in the media either as reporters or news anchors or even as company CEOs or even clergy and yet they would score highly as introverts in any personality test anytime. This is a clear indication that contrary to the popular belief, introverts do not usually hide from other people or shun publicity because they fear attention or because they are shy, â€Å"Introverts seek time alone because they want time alone. An introvert and a shy person might be standing against the wall at a party, but the introvert prefers to be there, while the shy individual feels she has no choice† (Helgoe 1). In an increasingly overt society where socialization and expanding ones social networks through making new friends seem to be the order of the day, many would appear to want to sympathize with those who are incapable of doing the same. However it has by now become apparent that introverts are not abnormal individuals just different; they are not a miserably sad lot but only derive happiness from different things and might show their happiness in a different way. There are certain human conditions that are easily discernible while others are not easy to diagnose. For example, â€Å"It’s easy to know whether someone is miserable on the one hand, or ecstatic on the other. But how do you quantify the states in between? You can determine how grateful a person feels, or whether they’re in a state of flow at any given moment, or how well they like a sad song, but how do you add all these things up to conclude that one person is happy and another is not? † (Cain 1). Happiness is something that is felt internally, more so to the introverts. As such for someone to use indicators of happiness as the level of socialization, smiles and laughter as the ultimate measure of happiness or lack of it is to miss the point. Understanding how happy introverts are one has to use the standards of the very introverts. It would be quite insensitive to conclude that introverts are generally sad just because they prefer to keep as little company as they can possibly accommodate. What everyone needs to understand is the fact that introverts only view life different and do prefer to socialize in a way that is remarkably different from the way extroverts do. As already alluded to earlier on introverts prefer seclusion to publicity not because they are shy or have no choice but because they prefer it that way. In order to measure the true level of happiness of introverts one need to use the standards set by introverts themselves and not the standards for happiness set by extroverts. Written By Justin Baker Cited works Rubin, Kenneth Coplan Robert. The Development of Shyness and Social Withdrawal. New York: The Guilford Press. 2010. March 22nd,2013. Cain, Susan. â€Å"Quiet: the power of introverts†. Psychology Today. December 9th, 2011. March 22nd, 2013. Surban, Glori. â€Å"Why I remain an introvert, though the science suggest extroverts are happier. † The Not-So-Crazy Introvert Celebrates the Quiet Life. June 11th, 2012. March 22nd, 2013. lt; http://crazyintrovert. com/2012/06/why-i-remain-introvert-though-science. htmlgt; Buettner, Dan. â€Å"Are extroverts happier than introverts? † Psychology Today. May 14th, 2012. March 22nd, 2013. lt; http://www. psychologytoday. com/blog/thrive/201205/are-extroverts-happier-introvertsgt; Psychology Dictionary. March 22nd, 2013.